Home :

Family Ties

President George W. Bush has kept the family central to both his domestic and foreign policy. He recognizes the family “as a source of help, hope, and stability,” and has repeatedly stated that his Administration is committed to strengthening the family. Not only has he called upon Americans “to honor the family,” but he also maintains that a vital role of government is to “protect institutions in our society.” The family is one social institution that needs our collective protection.

The United States Census Bureau defines a family as “two or more persons related by birth, marriage or adoption who reside in the same household.” Of course, this definition cannot begin to capture the richness of family life in the United States — celebrating anniversaries, wiping runny noses, caring for an elderly parent, practicing spelling lessons, tucking in one’s children to sleep, and kissing one’s spouse goodnight. In contrast to the sometimes-surreal world of professional life, one economist once observed, “The real world is the world around the kitchen table, the world of the nursery, the world of the bedroom.”

Claiming that the family matters is not simply an appeal to sentiment. Political philosophers, social historians, and civic and religious leaders throughout the ages have praised the family as the foundation of the social order, the bedrock of a nation, and the bastion of civilization. Cicero, for example, spoke of the family as “the first society” and “the seedbed of the state.”

The family is a universal and irreplaceable community, rooted in human nature, that is the basis for all societies at all times. As the cradle of life and love for each new generation, the family is the primary source of personal identity, self-esteem, and support for children. It is also the first and foremost school of life, uniquely suited to teach children integrity, character, morals, responsibility, service, and wisdom.

These roles of transmitting culture and socializing children make the family indispensable to civil society, as families transform helpless, dependent babies into responsible, independent adults. Two of America’s founding fathers, John Adams and John Witherspoon, expressed particular appreciation for these “effects” of the family—and called the family “the seedbed of virtue” and the bedrock of civil society. Over a century later, President Theodore Roosevelt claimed that there is “no finer factory of individual character” than the family, which he also viewed as the wellspring of citizenship. More recently, President George W. Bush said that the character of the nation “begins in the home,” as the family “is largely responsible for the development of character, morals, responsibility, and wisdom.”

Despite its well-documented decline, the institution of marriage remains central to family life. Indeed, by bringing together two people in a lifelong bond, marriage creates new families. Marriage also links existing families in a manner that invigorates and perpetuates both. Marriage weaves ties of belonging between the couple, their parents and extended kin, their anticipated children, and society at large.

Men and women of full age ... have the right to marry and to found a family, marriage is not so much about rights, but responsibilities. The married couple sets a pattern of sacrifice, duty, and obligation that naturally flows into parental duties of raising and nurturing children.

The commitment and reciprocal responsibilities in marriage benefit society by helping to create stable homes for children. Children are more likely to enjoy warm, enduring relationships with their parents when their parents themselves sustain warm, enduring relationships with each other. Empirical studies consistently indicate that, while many factors influence child development, growing up within the context of a healthy marriage decreases the risk that children will suffer from emotional or behavioral problems, be victims of abuse or neglect, and struggle in school.

Adults also benefit from healthy and stable marriages. Married adults tend to live longer, healthier lives. Married mothers suffer from lower rates of depression than their single counterparts. Married couples enjoy higher incomes and lower living costs, and save more money and accumulate more wealth, than their unmarried counterparts. Healthy marriages and healthy families are good for children, adults, and the nation.

During the last century, families have faced unprecedented challenges, both political and cultural. From ideologies that seek to supplant familial devotion with political devotion, to cultural trends that emphasize adult desires over children’s needs, the family has suffered from a range of social pressures.

By their very nature, totalitarian movements seek to subsume familial devotion to devotion to the state. Every totalitarian movement of the twentieth century, from communism to Nazism, sought to weaken families. As a result, these societies too often relied upon state-sponsored institutions to care for children, often to the exclusion of empowering families to care for their own children themselves, in their own homes.

In the last generation, by contrast, the pressures on the family appear to have come less from political forces and more from cultural changes in the West. By the late-1970s, cultural voices emerged that questioned the utility of the family and marital commitment to the needs of children. As a result, at least in part, marriage rates declined over the past four decades, while rates of divorce, unwed childbearing, and cohabitation increased. While many of these trends stabilized over the 1990s, currently one-third of births in the United States are to unmarried parents. Of the remaining two-thirds of children born to married parents, a projected 40 percent will see their mother and father divorce. In some communities, a staggering 70 percent of births are to unmarried parents. The consequences for the health and well-being of the children and the community cannot be underestimated or understated. Such data strongly suggest that the condition of U.S. families and even families around the world needs strengthening now more than ever.

Given the important role that families play in society, does the state have any role in supporting the family? We believe the answer is yes. Government, within appropriate limits, should work to support and strengthen families. To support families effectively, government must recognize that families exist apart from the state. The U.S. Declaration of Independence indicates that all human beings are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, in other words, rights that predate the state. The state can only recognize and acknowledge these rights. In the same manner, the family is a gift that the state should not deny or manipulate for its own purposes. The state must recognize and respect the family for what it is, as a matter of fundamental moral and natural law. By intruding on the prerogatives of the family or ignoring the decline of the family, the state weakens its very foundation. The state’s foremost obligation in this sphere is to respect, defend, and protect the family as an institution. As President George W. Bush has said, the state should “honor the family.”

The state should proactively strengthen the family for a number of reasons. By shoring up the family as an institution, the state strengthens the foundation of civil society. When civil society is weak, citizens feel less connected to others and more subject to the whims of a politicized and conflicted world beyond their control.

The state should aim to strengthen families because stronger families mean higher levels of well-being among the rising generation. A significant number of today’s children and youth are struggling -- they suffer from unacceptably high levels of emotional distress, behavioral problems, and mental illness. Even with all the added social and psychological services directed to the young, too many remain anxious and depressed, symptoms associated with unacceptably high rates of suicide, substance abuse, and a number of physical ailments. Children and youth desperately want and need loving families.

The proactive role extends to strengthening and supporting healthy marriages. Specifically, strengthening the family means encouraging greater love and loyalty between all family members, and especially promoting loving, faithful, and healthy marriages. It also means encouraging increased connection and communication between parents and children, as well as encouraging involvement of both fathers and mothers in rearing children in a positive and healthy environment and in teaching them the values and morals essential to personal achievement and the good of society.

Finally, even if government policy does what it can to strengthen healthy marriages, many children will grow up in other less-than-ideal situations. Though programs provide a safety net for many families and children, there are limits to government intervention. Social services cannot replace the natural, human relationships—especially those of involved mothers and fathers—that are ideal for children’s development. Whether support is channeled through cash assistance, in-kind transfers, or social workers, these worthwhile endeavors can only supplement what children need most -- the love and attention of their mother and father. No government program can replace families. Looking primarily upon the family, rather than government, to improve the prospects of the next generation is rooted in “compassionate conservatism,” the cornerstone of President Bush’s domestic policy.

At the center of compassionate conservatism is the same idea that underlies our liberal democracy -- every life has dignity and worth. We know that each child has the greatest chance to realize his or her worth, and achieve his or her potential, when he or she is raised within the context of a strong family. Therefore, public policy should support all families, because each and every child deserves support. At the same time, since marriage is so foundational to strong family life, public policy should seek to ensure that greater numbers of children grow up in a loving family with their own, two married parents. To the extent U.S. public policy is successful in supporting healthy families, the United States can be successful in preventing many of the social ills that impede the healthy development of children and place strains on families and communities.

If the United States is successful in preventing many of the impediments to the healthy development of children and families, we can also obviate the need for other more costly – and more intrusive – interventions. For example, children who grow up in dysfunctional families are more likely to be abused and neglected. The United States has a child welfare system to investigate potential instances of abuse and neglect, and a foster care system to take care of children who are abused and neglected. Further, if effective public policy can help couples form and sustain healthy marriages, fewer children will be abused or neglected, and the result will be a reduced dependence on and need for child welfare services. Similar types of public policy could also impact nearly every U.S. social program. From child protective services to child support enforcement, from anti-poverty programs to services for runaway youth, the strains on social programs are exacerbated by the breakup of families and marriages; policies that reinforce family strengthening and support could have positive impacts.

What are the principles that ought to shape domestic policy in a way that honors and values the family?

1. Government ought to create the conditions that allow families to thrive.
   Perhaps the most effective policy measures that support or strengthen the family are indirect ones in which governments enable the family to thrive on its own and function autonomously. Two indirect measures for strengthening the family follow.
   1. Government ought to keep the tax burden on families as low as possible.
      According to research by the nonpartisan Brookings Institution and Urban Institute in the United States, the federal tax burden on the average American family has risen dramatically in the past 50 years. In 1955, the median-income family of four faced an average federal income tax rate of about 7 percent (representing both income and employee Social Security taxes). By 1997, that same rate had increased to 17 percent. The increase of the child tax credit, along with President Bush’s income tax-rate cuts, has actually reduced the rate to 14 percent in 2001. But this is still double the tax rate families paid just 50 years ago. It comes as no surprise that many families feel overburdened by the amount of taxes they must pay.
   2. Governments ought to create the conditions whereby both parents do not feel pressured to be in the workplace just to make ends meet.
      Public policy should not presume that having two parents in the full-time paid workforce should be the ideal, especially for families with young children. Anecdotal and survey research consistently shows that parents would like to have the opportunity to spend more time with their children. It is important that public policy remain neutral as to which parent works outside the home and which parent stays home managing the household and caring for the children; that choice should be left to the couple. However, too many couples today simply do not have this option. They are striving to be good parents by providing financially for their children, yet they also want to provide more nurturing, and emotional support. These types of responsibilities take time. Therefore, parents should at least have the option to split their roles and functions in the family if they so choose, and public policy should help to enable families with greater flexibility to address the needs of their children.

2. Government ought to recognize the unique and irreplaceable contributions of both mothers and fathers to the lives of their children.
   Research has shown that mothers and fathers, on average, tend to parent differently in at least some important ways, offering their children different skills and gifts. From the earliest days of infancy, research also shows that children respond to these differences in their parents. Both mothers and fathers make unique and irreplaceable contributions to the lives of their children. Public policy should seek to strengthen the bonds connecting fathers to their children, while honoring the role of motherhood as an esteemed and respected institution in society.

3. Because each child has dignity and worth, government must support children and families regardless of family structure.
   Though we are hopeful that more children will grow up with married parents, the reality is that children need support regardless of the family situation in which they find themselves. Thus, support for healthy marriages must not come at the expense of supporting children living in other family structures. As President Bush has said, “Single mothers do amazing work in difficult circumstances, succeeding at a job far harder than most of us can possibly imagine. They deserve our respect and they deserve our support.” All children are unique gifts and have unique talents, and each and every one of them deserves support and encouragement, regardless of their family arrangement.

Valuing the Family: A Call to the Nations

Nations and governments have a choice – they can either support these incredible benefits of the family to the lives of children, adults and societies throughout the world, or they can neglect, challenge or suppress them. It is in the global community’s best interest to advocate for stronger family support and strengthening.

In seeking to call attention to the remarkable value of the family, the United Nations’ Universal Declaration of Human Rights is exemplary. This 1948 document reflects an exalted view of the family and obligates governments to respect, protect, and defend the family, with particular attention to honoring childhood and protecting parenthood.

The United States commits itself, and encourages all countries to do more to affirm and promote the institution of the family. The United States calls for the strengthening of family bonds around the world by encouraging governments and other public and private stakeholders to promote strong and healthy marriages and increased connection and communication between parents and children. Such measures should also foster greater involvement of both fathers and mothers in rearing children in healthy and positive environments, and teaching children values and morals essential to personal achievement and the common good.

Government is one actor among many whose decisions impact the health and well-being of families. Government policy is therefore limited in what it can do to strengthen families. But what it can do, it ought to do -- to place the family as a critical component of the public policy dialogue so as to enable future generations to gain promise and hope and the best possible opportunities.

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. A Celebration of the Family – Observance of the Tenth Anniversary of the International Year of the Family. Excerpts from a report developed by the Administration for Children and Families. October 2004.

top of page

back a page