The United States has pockets in the South in which a very different language is spoken. That language has a variety of dialects, but all are more similar to each other than to English. This can pose difficulties for those who don’t speak Southern but who travel to that region. To make matters more challenging, most Southerners are able to understand standard English, and may wonder if those who can’t understand them are perhaps a little dim.
While some Southerners are suspicious of those who speak other languages, such as standard English, many are very hospitable and happy to accommodate non-native Southern speakers to the best of their ability. It is a little known fact, outside of the South, that Southerners only speak slowly and loudly to those from other regions in order to help them understand Southspeak. It may come as a surprise that when only Southerners are present, they tend to speak much more quickly, as everyone present can understand their language. (This fact is so little known primarily because, due to economic employment migration patterns, it is extremely rare for Southerners to be in a situation in which all those who are present are truly Southern, and even when this rare event occurs, the slow speaking becomes rather habitual.)
One of the few times one has the opportunity to hear the natural rate of Southern speakers is at Southern auctions, because of a long standing tradition (since the Civil War) of Southern auctioneers to not “dumb it down for the Yanks” in order to give Southerners participating in the auction the advantage.
Southern At The Track
Ahmna:
I'm going to, as in, "If Ah'm drahvin' et core, ahmna pit pretty soon."
Awl:
An amber fluid used to lubricate engines. "Ah think ov blown an awl line."
Bah:
Pass before, as in, "He looked all rot when he came bah me."
Bigole:
Something large "Et's a bigole dent he got in the door."
Core:
The racing vehicle, as in, "Et core can rilly flah."
Cut down a tar:
Have a flat.
Flah:
1) An insect; 2) Go very fast, as in, "wad open."
Fon'l:
Last, as in fon'l lap or fon'l item on this list.
Fotten:
Struggling with, as in, "He's rilly fotten et core."
Goz:
Males, as in, "Those goz are a great crew."
Ha sod:
Top part of the track.
Insod:
Low part of the track.
Lot:
Opposite of dark: "With this rain de-lay, we ain't qot a lotta lot left."
Prom tahm:
When naht races are telecast.
Rot:
Opposite of left, as in, "He got a lotta damage on the rot sod of the core."
Tin:
A unit in the deca system, as in, "He's got et core in the top tin."
Wad:
As open as you can git.
Wahl:
An interval of time: "It looks like he's gonna be in the pits a wahl."
How To Speak Southern
Ah:
First person singular frequently preceding "reckon."
Arshtaters:
A staple of the Irish diet and the source of French fries. 'Ah like arshtaters, but Ah hate to peel 'em?"
Ast:
To interrogate or inquire, as when a revenue agent seeks Information about illegal moonshine stills. "Don't ast me so many questions. It makes me mad?"
Bod:
To wait, as in, "He's gonna bod his tahm."
Bum:
An explosive device dropped from airplanes called bummers. "Ah think we ought to drop the atomic bum on 'em?"
Bumminham:
The biggest city in Alabama. "You can travel cross this entire land, they ain't no place like Bumminham?"
Caint:
Cannot. "Ah just caint understand why this checkbook won't balance?"
Carry:
To convey from one place to another, usually by automobile. "Can you carry me down to the store in yo' car?"
Dawfins:
Name of the professional football team in Miami. "You think the Dawfins can win the conference this year?"
Dawg:
A four-legged animal much esteemed in rural sections of the South."Ah just don't feel right unless Ah got a couple, of huntin' dawgs around the house?"
Et:
1) To have eaten. "You done et?" 2) That.
Etlanna:
The city General Sherman burned during the War for Southern Independence. "Etlanna is kind of like New York with pecan trees?"
Far:
A state of combustion that produces heat and light. "Ah reckon it's about time to put out the far and call in the dawgs?"
Fault:
To place blame. "You can't fault a man for takin' a little drank of. liquor once in a while?"
Fixin:
Getting ready to. "Ah'm fixin to dig me some worms and go fishin'."
Griyuts:
What no Southern breakfast would be complete without, grits. "Ah like griyuts with butter and sawt on 'em, but Ah purely love 'em with red-eye gravy."
Gull:
A female. "She's just about the sweetest, prettiest gull in town?"
Haint:
A ghost, spirit or apparition. "If you walk past the graveyard at midnight, you might see a haint?"
Hale:
Where General Sherman is going for what he did to Etlanna. "General Sherman said 'War is hale,' and he made sure it was."
Hord:
Difficult.
Idinit:
Term employed by genteel Southerñers who wish to avoid saying "Ain't" "Mighty hot today, idinit?"
Idy:
Idea. "Have you got any idy the tricks that dawg can do?"
Jawja:
Southern state just north of Florida. "Sherman burnt .Etlanna when he marched through Jawja."
Jevver:
Did you ever. "Jevver hear anything so dumb in your life?"
Keer:
To be concerned. "That girl don't keer nothin' about him."
Kindly:
Sort of. "When Ed's line broke and he lost that big bass, he just looked kindly pale and sick."
Like to:
Almost. "When Ah saw she had on the same dress I did, Ah like to died."
Likker:
Whisky; either the amber kind bought in stores or the homemade white kind the federal authorities frown upon. "Does he drink? Listen, he spills more likker than most people drink"
Ma'am (and Suh):
Archaic terms of courtesy and respect Southern children once were taught to use when addressing their elders. "Now when you talk to your teacher, you make sure you say 'Yes, ma'am' and 'No, ma'am,' you hear me?"
Mahl:
5,280 feet.
Naht:
What occurs after sundown.
Nawthun:
Anything that is not Southern. "He is a classic product of the superior Nawthun educational system." (Sarcasm)
Nyawlins:
The largest city in Louisiana (pronounced Loosyana). "Nyawlins is a nice town if you got a lot of money."
Orta:
Should. "You orta see her in that bikini."
Ose:
A type of car produced by General Motors. "That '55 Ose was the best car Ah ever had."
Ov:
I have, as in, "Ov had some experience with that, and it's hord."
Pot likker:
The rich liquid left in the pot after the greens have been cooked for several hours. May be drunk or sopped up with biscuits. "Pot likker is full of vitamins and minerals."
Prolly:
Likely to. "Ah'll prolly go to Etlanna this weekend."
Quare:
Strange, peculiar. "Ole Virgil's been actin' quare ever since that mule kicked him in the head."
Quietus:
Pronounced kwi-EET-us and meaning to bring to an abrupt halt. "He was runnin' around with that blonde waitress from the Blue Moon Cafe 'til his wife found out about it and put the quietus on it."
Ratcheer:
On this spot. "jest put the groceries down ratcheer."
Reckon:
An expression of supposition or intent. "Where do you reckon he got that plaid suit?"
Summers:
Somewhere. "Ah know that boy's around here summers."
Sumpm:
Something. "There's sumpm funny goin' on."
Tahm:
A Yankee dictionary defines it as "A nonspatial continuum in which events occur in apparently irreversible succession from the past through the present to the future." Let's just say you either have too much of it or not enough. "It takes a long tahm to read the Sunday New York Tahms."
Tar:
A round inflatable object that sometimes goes flat. "You shouldn't drive that car without a spare tar."
Ugly:
Unpleasant, disagreeable or mean. "Now Junior, don't you be ugly to your new sister."
Uhmurkin:
Someone who lives in the United States of Uhmurka. "Thomas Jefferson was a great Uhmurkin."
Vampar:
A fearsome creature that sleeps in a coffin and lives on human blood. "Dracula was a vampar."
ViEENer:
Small canned sausages. "You want smore viEENers?"
Waller:
Rolling about, usually done by children and hogs. "Billy, don't you waller all over that bed. Ah jest made it up."
War:
Metal strands attached to posts to enclose domestic animals. "Be careful and don't get stuck on that bob war."
Yankee dime:
A kiss. "How 'bout a Yankee dime, sugar?"
Yankee shot:
A Southern child's navel. "Momma what's this on my belly?" "That's where the Yankee shot you. That's yo Yankee shot."
Zackly:
Precisely. "Ah don't zackly know where he is."
